Twinkle twinkle little star, I want to hit you with a car. Throw you off a bridge so high,Hope you break your neck and die.

We had a very successful trip to Russia we got back. — Bob Hope

Enjoy life. Think of all the women who passed up dessert on the Titanic. — Anonymous

Everybody should believe in something  I believe I&#039;ll have another drink. — Anonymous

I know lots more old drunks than old doctors. — Joe E. Lewis

My doctor said I look like a million dollars - green and wrinkled. — Red Skelton

Condoms aren&#039;t completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one . . . and got hit by a bus. — Bob Rubin

I can&#039;t believe that out of a hundred thousand sperm  you were the quickest. — Steven Pearl

I hope you live to be as old as your jokes. — Anonymous

she: Before we got married  you told me you were well-off. he: I was  and I didn&#039;t know it. — Jacob Braude