Quotes by George Carlin, Brain Droppings

Explore a curated collection of 25 quotes by George Carlin, Brain Droppings. Discover timeless wisdom, insightful thoughts, and memorable words that have inspired readers around the world. Browse through the gallery below and click on any quote to read more.

Once you leave out all the bullshit they teach you in school, life gets really simple. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
People say, 'I'm going to sleep now,' as if it were nothing. But it's really a bizarre activity. 'For the next several h — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I've begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR: 'Please stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, relig — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
You show me a lazy prick who's lying in bed all day, watching TV, only occasionally getting up to piss, and I'll show yo — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
So, have a little fun. Soon enough you'll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I, myself, have killed six people. All random, all undetected, no way to trace them to me. And, let me tell you, there's — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
It turned out I was pretty good in science. But again, because of the small budget, in science class we couldn't afford — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I'm happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
If your kid needs a role model and you ain't it, you're both fucked. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
There are women named Faith, Hope, Joy, and Prudence. Why not Despair, Guilt, Rage, and Grief? It seems only right. 'Tom — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
Do you know why hurricanes have names instead of numbers? To keep the killing personal. No one cares about a bunch of pe — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
It was my uncle who taught me about the birds and the bees. He sat me down one day and said, 'Remember this, George, the — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
My mother would say, 'Why are you always playing alone?' And I would say, 'I'm not playin', Ma. I'm fuckin' serious! — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I went through the usual stages: imp, rascal, scalawag, whippersnapper. And, of course, after that it's just a small ste — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I can remember staring at the orphanage and feeling envy. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
I was a hip kid. When I saw Bambi it was the midnight show. — George Carlin, Brain Droppings
And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized — George Carlin, Brain Droppings