Is thyselves even a word?

The best contraceptive for old people is nudity. — Phyllis Diller

My health is good  it&#039;s my age that&#039;s bad. — Roy Acuff

He&#039;s so old his social security number is two digits. — Brian Morgan

The best way to remember your wife&#039;s birthday is to forget it once. — E. Joseph Cossman

She&#039;s too young for Medicare and too old for me to care. — Anonymous

There are three signs of old age: loss of memory ... I forget the other two. — Red Skelton

Once my wife gave me a wonderful birthday present. She let me win an argument. — Anonymous

If you want to know how old a woman is . . . ask her sister-in-law. — Edgar Howe

My wife loves Europe  but to me it&#039;s a bad day at a theme park. — Jay Leno

Hollywood is a place where people from Iowa mistake each other for movie stars. — Fred Allen