Quotes by Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

Explore a curated collection of 9 quotes by Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea. Discover timeless wisdom, insightful thoughts, and memorable words that have inspired readers around the world. Browse through the gallery below and click on any quote to read more.

Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
My negotiation skills are are on par with George Bush's reading ability. And just like Dubya, every time I've tried to p — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Austin and I proceeded to knock back a couple of Ketel One and grapefruit juices, which happened to be my drink of the m — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
While looking at a website for liposuction, I learned that it was a six-to eight-week recovery period, the clincher bein — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
I don't appreciate people who celebrate their dog's birthdays with "dog parties," and then invite their friends who don' — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Shamu and I have arrived safely in Costa Rica. He was stopped by airport security because he carries enough artillery in — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
Seconds later, the female security officer grabbed a pair of my father's shorts from the top of the duffel bag, and empt — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
The big one was at least cute, and as annoying as she was, you couldn't get mad at a golden retriever. — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
I went out with a guy who once told me I didn’t need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I’m drin — Chelsea Handler, Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea